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The rules are simple to win: No "xxx" jokes, sorry. Kit Menkin cannot win  (relatives, friends and employees can enter and win). Please note, if in the decision of the judges there is no "best" joke, a previous month may be included, and like in horseshoes, there are no ties. Winners of previous months can also win a second or third time - There is no limit.

Please send me your favorite joke. The first one to send it, not only gets the credit, but a good bottle of wine or a box of chocolate (the winner’s choice).

Winner for April

Stewart Kahn of Redondo Beach, California.

( Second time Stu has won this contest. He gets a 1 pound box of Godiva truffles plus a two pound box of Godiva Gold Ballotin chocolate as his award )

He previous won in November, 1999


Joke of the Month

80,000 blondes

80,000 blondes meet in Nashville, Tennessee for a "Blondes Are Not Stupid Convention"

The presenter says "We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?"

One blonde steps up. The presenter says to her "What is 15 plus 15?" After 15 or 20 seconds she says "Eighteen."

Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then 80,000 blondes start cheering "Give her another chance! Give her another chance!"

The presenter says, "Well since we've gone to the trouble of getting 80,000 of you here and the world wide press, I guess we can give her another chance".

So he says, "What is 5 plus 5?"

After nearly 30 seconds she eventually says "Ninety?" The presenter sighs - everyone is crestfallen and the blonde starts crying and 80,000 girls start yelling "Give her another chance! Give her another chance"!.

The presenter, unsure whether or not he is doing more harm than damage, eventually says, "Ok! One more chance. What is 2 plus 2?" The girl closes her eyes and after a whole minute eventually says "Four".

Around the stadium 80,000 girls' start yelling, "Give her another chance! Give her another chance!"



Stewart Kahn requested the Godiva Chocolate rather than wine. He notes he has not used alcohol or drugs for 13 years. He has come a long way and I am very proud to say I have known him for almost thirty years (since 1973!)...

Current: Executive Vice President and Chief Operating Officer of Prospect Medical Holdings, Inc. Prospect is a managed care management company which contracts with HMO's in California on the one side; and then contracts with physicians to provide primary care health services on the other side. Prospect provides health care to approximately 110,000 people located in Orange County, Downey, Sherman Oaks and the Antelope Valley.
1987-1997: President and CEO of Legend Capital Corporation. Legend provided loans and related services primarily to the health care industry. Legend placed approximately $150 million in loans between 1992 and 1997. Legend's largest customer was Prospect Medical Holdings, Inc.
1985-1987: Sabbatical time off...
1983-1984: Westinghouse Business Credit, Tustin, CA. Area Sales Manager for the asset-based business credit division of Westinghouse.
1979-1983: Vice President and Chief Credit Officer of Intercoastal Leasing Corporation, San Rafael, CA.
1973-1979: Vice President and Chief Credit Officer of Westguard Leasing Corporation, Sausalito, CA. Recently married to a woman 21 years younger than him ( :) ), and recently purchased a new home in Redondo Beach, California - see their web page at: In addition to living with his new bride, they have a 6 year old Boxer named Lucy.


Past Jokes of the Month


John Wold of St. Charles, Illinois
The Internet Warnings

Dash Menkin of Elko, Nevada
The Blonde and the Attorney

Jim Hanzlik of Watsonville, California
A big box of See's favorite, Millenium Tin Collector,
plus a Valentine Day box to give to his sweetheart

Dan Sorkin of Piedmont, California
A case of Chateau St. Julien Monterey Merlot
Third Time Winner

Stewart Kahn of Los Angeles, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

Randy Warshawsky of San Jose, California
1994 Joullian Cabernet Sauvignon, Carmel Valley
1996 Castillo Saugiuvese

Dougald Turnbull of Campbell, California
1989 Georis Cabernet Sauvignon, Carmel Valley
1995 Turnbull Cabernet Sauvignon Napa Valley, Oakville

Wally Lunny of San Francisco/Glen Elen, California
A case of 1997 Chateau St. Julien Monterey Estate Merlot

Second Time Winner

Kevin Skelly of Saratoga, California
1994 Robert Sinskey Pinot Noir Reserve, Los Carneros, Napa Valley
1995 Robert Sinskey Merlot Reserve, Los Carneros, Napa Valley


Chris Cross of Hayward, California
1997 Duckhorn Vineyard Napa Valley Sauvignon Blanc,
1996 Clos Du Bois Sonoma County Pinot Noir
and a box of Schurras Fancy Chocolate

John Turnbull of Mendocino, California
1995 Turnbull Cabernet Sauvignon, Napa Valley, Oaksville

Jerry Jacob,
San Rafael, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

Bob Bressler, Los Altos Hills, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

R. Donald Chapman, San Jose, California
1994 Chateau Latour a Pomerol, prop. Mme. L.P. Lacaste Loubal

Jim Beck, Los Gatos, California
1994 Estate Grown Copper-Garrod Cabernet Sauvignon, Santa Cruz Mountain Appellation



Russ Mattos, Mountain View, California
Two great tickets plus parking pass for the Monday Night San Francisco 49ergame at 3Com Park

Kim Davison, San Jose, California
Case of 1998 Campus Oaks Chardonnay

Dan Sorkin, Piedmont, California
Two pound box of Godiva Chocolate and second time winner,
one pound box of Godiva Truffles

Rosalie, Santa Cruz, California
1995 "Reserve Speciale" Barons de Rothschild (Lafite)Medoc

Dan Sorkin, Piedmont, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

Jim Swander, Bellevue, Washington
1989 Ridge Santa Cruz Mountain Monte Bello

Nanette Weintraub, Los Gatos, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

Walter J. Lunny, III, San Francisco/Glen Ellen, California
1976 Bolla Amarone Classico Chianti

Jim Hanzlik, Watsonville, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

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